As with most things in the land of Celosia, I'm not talking about anything remotely "schoolish" for her. At the beginning, almost everything in life helps a baby learn. But I am a fan of enrichment, so what has Robin been up to?
In Glenn Doman's book, How Smart is Your Baby? (horrible title, good book, it is available at most libraries), there are different activities to do with your baby from birth onward. I like the initial red stage activities, I've pretty much skipped the orange stage with both of my kids, and now Robin is mostly ready for the yellow stage. Find some amazing checklists here to help you stay organized and for lots of other tips, visit DomanMom's blog.
I'm just going to jump in where we are right now. Disclaimer: I don't follow the program exactly, but it does help me to be mindful throughout the day about how I can play with Robin and what to include in her environment. So what does the yellow stage look like?
1) Touching lots of different and contrasting textures
2) Learning about objects (mostly fruit) through her five senses - taste, smell, texture, seeing the real thing, a picture of it, the written word, and hearing me say its name.
3) Seeing bits of intelligence every day (large, simple, clear pictures, one per 10 in x 10 in card)
4) Balance activities - tons of fun and both my kids have enjoyed these tremendously.
General ideas from the program I also like (paraphrased by me):
1) Keep baby in the least restrictive environment possible - sitting on my lap vs. sitting in a chair
2) Lots and lots of belly time - get the whole family on the floor with the baby often, or raise the baby up to your level (belly on bed and you on the floor so heads are level)
3) The main idea is purposeful interaction to help develop awareness, mobility, and language.
4) Let the baby move, move, move!
It can be very intimidating at first, but just pick something to add to your baby's life. You don't have to do the whole thing to be successful. Even if it just encourages you to talk to your baby more, look at books together, go on walks, etc, then you're doing a great job. With Raccoon I'd always feel guilty, like I wasn't doing enough, but even from the little I did he benefited. I'm not organized enough to be a full Doman mom, but the important thing is that we like what I do.
"As I have walked the world—a tramp for the Lord—I have learned a few lessons in God's great classroom." Corrie ten Boom
Showing posts with label Doman. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Doman. Show all posts
Thursday, May 30, 2013
Wednesday, May 29, 2013
Coming out of the Doman Closet
I am a Doman mom. Arg, I just jumped out of the flashcard closet, let me back in, let me back in! Before the bashing begins, I have to say a few things in my defense. If you have no idea what I'm talking about... all the better for me. :)
1) Bits of intelligence are really quite a bit more than flashcards. It's more like the illustrations from a picture book. I think it's the "drill and kill" idea (which I've mentioned before here and here) that people object to, more than the actual material itself.
2) Raccoon LOVED doing bits with me, up until he was about 7 months old and crawling all over.
3) The whole program has a huge emphasis on mobility, which has always worked well in our family.
4) JOY. It's all about joyful learning. If it's not fun, stop it and do something different.
5) I also firmly believe that it works for some and doesn't for others, so the best thing for the child is to have a happy mother who enjoys being with her children (most of the time, ha ha). If it's stressing you out, then it's not a good thing in real life no matter how much it looks great on paper.
6) There seems to be a double standard out there. If your child is born with known special needs, then you are encouraged to do every type of available therapy to help them "catch up." But if they are born normal (as far as you know), then for some, any type of early learning is considered forced and bad. For me, the goal is to help my well children be as well as they can be.
1) Bits of intelligence are really quite a bit more than flashcards. It's more like the illustrations from a picture book. I think it's the "drill and kill" idea (which I've mentioned before here and here) that people object to, more than the actual material itself.
2) Raccoon LOVED doing bits with me, up until he was about 7 months old and crawling all over.
3) The whole program has a huge emphasis on mobility, which has always worked well in our family.
4) JOY. It's all about joyful learning. If it's not fun, stop it and do something different.
5) I also firmly believe that it works for some and doesn't for others, so the best thing for the child is to have a happy mother who enjoys being with her children (most of the time, ha ha). If it's stressing you out, then it's not a good thing in real life no matter how much it looks great on paper.
6) There seems to be a double standard out there. If your child is born with known special needs, then you are encouraged to do every type of available therapy to help them "catch up." But if they are born normal (as far as you know), then for some, any type of early learning is considered forced and bad. For me, the goal is to help my well children be as well as they can be.
Sample Bits of Intelligence
Thursday, February 21, 2013
We're Back!
Little by little, Raccoon and I will be starting up some Tot School activities again. This morning we worked on the letter C from my mom's preschool alphabet book. It felt good to be active again. The last few weeks Raccoon has spent most of his play time dressing up in his various costumes.
Robin is three weeks old and doing her own early learning program (How Smart Is Your Baby: Develop and Nurture Your Newborn's Full Potential). Right now this consists of stimulating her different reflexes and a series of passive movements. She still spends more time asleep than awake (miracle of miracles!!!) so we're off to a slow start with her as well, which is just fine.
Builder
I came across a bag of animal masks that my mom sent us awhile ago.
Raccoon enjoyed trying them all on and running to see himself in our living room mirror.
Knight and ninja are his all-time favorite costumes. He got some new knight armor for Christmas since the cardboard set I made him is wearing out from so much use. If anyone knows where I could get real metal armor made for a child, Raccoon would love it!
Robin's first dress-up with big brother - Spiderman and an elf. This smile for the camera is a huge success for Raccoon since he still often runs the other way.
Robin is three weeks old and doing her own early learning program (How Smart Is Your Baby: Develop and Nurture Your Newborn's Full Potential). Right now this consists of stimulating her different reflexes and a series of passive movements. She still spends more time asleep than awake (miracle of miracles!!!) so we're off to a slow start with her as well, which is just fine.
Monday, January 14, 2013
Baby Break
Celosia School is officially on a baby break for an unknown period of time. I'll hopefully still be updating my home blog so come on over and check it if you'd like some news. Baby Robin is due any day now, then we have a country move coming up in June, and possibly starting homeschool pre-k in the fall.
I have done part of the Doman program with my first daughter, SB, and with Raccoon. I may be doing some of the activities with Robin as well, we'll see how it goes. If so, I may switch to posting about that for awhile since I don't anticipate doing many Tot School things with Raccoon in the upcoming months.
I have done part of the Doman program with my first daughter, SB, and with Raccoon. I may be doing some of the activities with Robin as well, we'll see how it goes. If so, I may switch to posting about that for awhile since I don't anticipate doing many Tot School things with Raccoon in the upcoming months.
Thursday, November 29, 2012
The Socialization Question
This has been on my mind lately, with several friends and family making comments about Raccoon needing time to play with "friends." He tends to be a bit antisocial or veeeeery slow to warm up. Other children, especially if they are younger than him, are often too touchy, too much in his space, and too unpredictable for him to play comfortably.
With Raccoon's sensory issues and food allergies, I wouldn't even really consider sending him to some sort of program, except that he does seem to want to be around other children at times. Last week he came home crying from the park because some older children wouldn't play with him. Where we live, the majority of children are in daycare/preschool from 1+ years old, so it is hard for us to consistently find other playmates. Of course I'm fun, but after watching him with his cousins, I feel like just being at home with me isn't enough. For now, I'm keeping the matter in prayer and talking with my husband about it. I recently received this in a newsletter I subscribe to, and although it does not seem based on research, it does echo some of my questions.
Your Questions About Social Growth
Don't I have to send my small child to preschool or daycare for socialization?
One of the great modern myths is that children need other children to become "socialized." The exact opposite is true. The notion that little children learn how to be civilized from being with each other has little to recommend it. What can a three-year-old teach another three-year-old? Answer: How to behave like a three-year-old.
When we place tiny children together, the result is chaos. If one child is a biter, then other children get bitten and learn that biting may be useful in self-defense. Generally, this is not the kind of social idea that mothers want their children to have.
If I don't send my child to kindergarten, how will they learn to share with other children?
Sometimes mothers are convinced to put their child with other children in what are called "play groups" or "kindergarten" because mother wants her child to learn to share. Mother believes that this cannot be learned at home from her. Sharing is an admirable and worthwhile objective. But two and three-year-olds are not ready to share anything. Instead, they defend their belongings against any and all comers. The "play group" only stays civilized if each mother stands right next to her child and protects that child from all the other children in the group. "Sharing" occurs only when mother pries the beloved toy truck out of her child's grasp and hands it to another child, who then gets a death grip on the truck until his mother says that he has "shared" the truck for long enough and it is pried out of his grasp to be returned to its little, very anxious owner.
If the above scene takes place without a mother with each child, then the result is much worse. Without mother at his side, the child will simply fight to keep his toy or be overpowered by a bigger, more aggressive child. He either learns to fight or to flee. Is this socialization?
Where can my child best learn proper behavior?
Little children do not need other little children to become socialized - they need mother and father. Civilized behavior is learned at home from mother and father. Children learn right from wrong from mother and father and grandmother and grandfather, or they do not learn it at all. The longer a small child spends with his mother each day, the more civilized he will be. The less time he spends with mother each day, the less civilized he will be.
Arrange for your child to spend more time with you every day and less time with other little children. Be consistent, fair, and honest in all your interactions with your child. In a few months you will have a more mature, kind, and helpful child, but, even better, you will be spending precious time with a wonderful companion who will love and support you for the rest of your life.
from the IAHP Newsletter, November 2012, Issue 34
With Raccoon's sensory issues and food allergies, I wouldn't even really consider sending him to some sort of program, except that he does seem to want to be around other children at times. Last week he came home crying from the park because some older children wouldn't play with him. Where we live, the majority of children are in daycare/preschool from 1+ years old, so it is hard for us to consistently find other playmates. Of course I'm fun, but after watching him with his cousins, I feel like just being at home with me isn't enough. For now, I'm keeping the matter in prayer and talking with my husband about it. I recently received this in a newsletter I subscribe to, and although it does not seem based on research, it does echo some of my questions.
Your Questions About Social Growth
Don't I have to send my small child to preschool or daycare for socialization?
One of the great modern myths is that children need other children to become "socialized." The exact opposite is true. The notion that little children learn how to be civilized from being with each other has little to recommend it. What can a three-year-old teach another three-year-old? Answer: How to behave like a three-year-old.
When we place tiny children together, the result is chaos. If one child is a biter, then other children get bitten and learn that biting may be useful in self-defense. Generally, this is not the kind of social idea that mothers want their children to have.
If I don't send my child to kindergarten, how will they learn to share with other children?
Sometimes mothers are convinced to put their child with other children in what are called "play groups" or "kindergarten" because mother wants her child to learn to share. Mother believes that this cannot be learned at home from her. Sharing is an admirable and worthwhile objective. But two and three-year-olds are not ready to share anything. Instead, they defend their belongings against any and all comers. The "play group" only stays civilized if each mother stands right next to her child and protects that child from all the other children in the group. "Sharing" occurs only when mother pries the beloved toy truck out of her child's grasp and hands it to another child, who then gets a death grip on the truck until his mother says that he has "shared" the truck for long enough and it is pried out of his grasp to be returned to its little, very anxious owner.
If the above scene takes place without a mother with each child, then the result is much worse. Without mother at his side, the child will simply fight to keep his toy or be overpowered by a bigger, more aggressive child. He either learns to fight or to flee. Is this socialization?
Where can my child best learn proper behavior?
Little children do not need other little children to become socialized - they need mother and father. Civilized behavior is learned at home from mother and father. Children learn right from wrong from mother and father and grandmother and grandfather, or they do not learn it at all. The longer a small child spends with his mother each day, the more civilized he will be. The less time he spends with mother each day, the less civilized he will be.
Arrange for your child to spend more time with you every day and less time with other little children. Be consistent, fair, and honest in all your interactions with your child. In a few months you will have a more mature, kind, and helpful child, but, even better, you will be spending precious time with a wonderful companion who will love and support you for the rest of your life.
from the IAHP Newsletter, November 2012, Issue 34
Friday, October 21, 2011
My Motivation
Since I had done a lot of reading before Raccoon was born, I felt like there was so much more that I should be doing to enrich Raccoon's crucial early years. I imagined other mothers being able to do these amazing programs with their children that I could not, due to trouble with nursing and sleeping, colic, several major moves, and other upheavals during Raccoon's first two years. I did the best that I could, incorporating as many things from the Doman books as possible. But as he grew and became increasingly mobile, almost everything that we were doing, and enjoying up to that point, stopped working. I got stressed trying to find new ways to make things work, and then it wasn't fun anymore for Raccoon or for me. I took a break for awhile from intentional early stimulation, and I stepped back to examine why I was so frustrated that things weren't working. So what if we didn't do any structured learning? One of the common criticisms of early learning is that the parents are forcing the children. I wondered, if I was really honest, did I have any hidden motivation or agenda?
In the end, I realized that my motives were a mixture of good and bad, like most things in life. Mostly, I wanted to share with Raccoon my love of learning. But if I was truly honest with myself, there was also some need to validate my capabilities as a mother by his achievements. "See, Raccoon can do this, so I'm not a total failure." After realizing this, I prayed a lot about whether I should continue or not. After a time, I felt peace about it and I set some new goals.
My new focus in every area is exposure and enjoyment, not mastery or performance. I don't need to know how much he knows, test him, or try to catch it on camera. Glen Doman says that the child will show the parent in time, and Maria Montessori said something like, "You don't dig up the seed to see if the plant is growing." As long as Raccoon and I are having fun, and the information that I provide is clear and of the highest quality that I can do in a reasonable amount of time, I am content. My focus is also on being more intentional about enriching the time that we spend together and to create more mutual respect in my relationship with Raccoon. (Love is already there and flourishing.) My ultimate hope and prayer is that if he learns that I listen to and respect him now while he's little, he'll still come to me and trust me to respect him when he's not so little anymore.
In the end, I realized that my motives were a mixture of good and bad, like most things in life. Mostly, I wanted to share with Raccoon my love of learning. But if I was truly honest with myself, there was also some need to validate my capabilities as a mother by his achievements. "See, Raccoon can do this, so I'm not a total failure." After realizing this, I prayed a lot about whether I should continue or not. After a time, I felt peace about it and I set some new goals.
My new focus in every area is exposure and enjoyment, not mastery or performance. I don't need to know how much he knows, test him, or try to catch it on camera. Glen Doman says that the child will show the parent in time, and Maria Montessori said something like, "You don't dig up the seed to see if the plant is growing." As long as Raccoon and I are having fun, and the information that I provide is clear and of the highest quality that I can do in a reasonable amount of time, I am content. My focus is also on being more intentional about enriching the time that we spend together and to create more mutual respect in my relationship with Raccoon. (Love is already there and flourishing.) My ultimate hope and prayer is that if he learns that I listen to and respect him now while he's little, he'll still come to me and trust me to respect him when he's not so little anymore.
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