Kindergarten Assessments

Raccoon and I have 46 school days left to complete our first 180 days of homeschool. Since January we have been doing more relaxed schooling, and it is working well for us, except that now I'm staring the end of the school year in the face and I feel like we haven't done enough. So I hopped online to find a K assessment to see how he measures up.

Things I discovered:

1) Most K evaluations only care about reading and math. I only found one lonely assessment for social studies.

2) Georgia has a 179 page kindergarten assessment in 7 subject areas.

3) California's transitional kindergarten assessment is all touchy-feely, and even includes subjects like cooking.

4) Finally, a K eval that is only 1 page long. Now that's what I'm talking about!

Now that we have a working printer - hooray! - I am going to print out my favorite assessments and use them as activity guides for our last 11 weeks of school (one more 5 day week, then 10 weeks of just 4 days. Ah, the benefit of starting school in July, we're done at the end of May).

The reason that I'm thinking about this question - did Raccoon "pass" kindergarten? - is because I may be heading Stateside this summer and looking for next year's curriculum. Do I call it K again, based on his slightly behind reading skills, or do I just jump into 1st grade and work with him to catch up? A lot depends on how things progress these next few months.

We're using Abeka's reading program, which I just discovered that I have, and he seems to be getting it. But I think I do need to make reading practice a daily item instead of just once a week. I backed off because he was starting to hate it, so I thought focusing more on what he likes (science, social studies) would help restore some balance. And it has, but now I feel like we're behind. I think next year I won't worry so much about getting in our number of school days, but instead focus more on the content he needs to master.

The other question lingering in the back of my head is... should I ask the K teacher at the school I hope to put him in (around 3rd grade), for her evaluation? Because really, that's the one place that matters, I think. Although based on age they might put him a grade behind anyway. He would be in their pre-K program this year, which would be a good match in reading, but too easy for other things, I think. I'm hoping that by the time I want to put him there, he will be placed based on his skill level and not just their age cutoff, which is September 1 (he's an October birthday). I don't mind if he's a leader among his peers, being one of the oldest in his class, but I desperately don't want him to be as bored in school as I was. My mom would tell me right about now, "Stop worrying about the future! Focus on this year."

All in all, I'm pleased with our first year of homeschooling. We've figured out a lot of what works and doesn't work for us. Evening school was a surprising success the other day. I think he's a night owl like me. Even Kitty wanted to "do words" like her big brother. My gut is that once reading clicks, he's going to jump ahead, so I shouldn't worry. But I always do, with all his skills, until the leap happens.

Thoughts for next year:

1) More organized activities for Kitty. Balancing her and Raccoon this year has been challenging at times, and he is going to need to do more sit-down school next year, I think.

2) More intentional curriculum. This year we just floated around doing whatever interested us. I enjoy picking out curriculum, but an A Beka 1st grade kit is looking tempting too.

3) Lots of science! I'd like to continue doing kits with him since he loves these. And working on setting up our own science laboratory with real equipment. I'd love to have a science shack out back, like a clubhouse.

4) More field trips!

5) More planning time to pull everything together.

6) A schedule, routine, rhythm, or something we can stick to that balances his social needs and learning time.

7) Find a homeschool group to join.

Homeschooling it is

I called a semi-local school with an English curriculum but their K is full, so homeschooling it is. I feel terrified.

Top fears that make my heart pound:
1) Will Raccoon learn to read?
2) Will I have enough time to prepare?
3) How is Kitty going to fit in to the picture? How will I be able to do Tot school with her, or at least keep her from eating the crayons?
4) What am I going to do when the comparison monster shows up (ah he's falling behind -panic!)
5) Will I be able to find a mother's helper, and if I don't will my house (or I) fall apart. (I know this one sounds spoiled and whiney, but my life is intense trying to keep up with all my plate spinning responsibilities).

Aside from these sweat-inducing topics, there is part of me that is also really, really excited. My mom is bringing me down 50 lbs of books. I should be able to be successful with that, right?

And if not, school registration starts in December... :)

Building a Schoolroom, and other things

It's not for sure yet - we'll make the final decision on Monday - but it looks like we're going to build a second floor on our little house on our land (currently nameless). We hope to have two guest rooms, an office for the King, and a schoolroom. I am so excited. I told Raccoon today that he wasn't going to go to school, but that he would do school at home with me. "I want to start right now!" he said. Me too.

I finally got our books out of storage, and as I put them on the shelves I thought of all the possibilities for projects and units. Being surrounded by books helps me feel much more confident in my ability to homeschool. My husband is better at sneaking in learning though, having a puppet ask Raccoon to count to ten. He's been able to count for awhile, but skips 3. I finally heard him count correctly, something he never would have done if I'd just asked him to count. He hates to perform, especially if he feels like there's expectations or the possibility of failure. We'll definitely have to work on his perfectionism. It's an ongoing theme in our household for sure.

If we do build, it should be finished mid-June, just when a friend is leaving. I bought all of her shelves and a small table. I can't wait to set up a space just for us. In the meantime, we've just been doing a lot of hands-on things like play-doh, nailing boards together, painting, and playing outside.

I've been focusing on character traits like perseverance, kindness (to his sister and our cats), hospitality (having friends over and what we do and say with guests), and respect.

Our internet is very slow, which makes it hard to post pictures, but I got two to upload.

 

Our current home, 80 square meters. I hope there will be a second 

floor up there in a few months! I long for a space of our own.

My first time with two at the table. Raccoon is tracing his hand and Kitty is eating the crayons. 

That's pretty much how school is going for now.

Projects and Dreams

When I find a new blog, I read through their latest posts until I find something that doesn't interest me. If It's right away, I simply click on. If I'm five or six posts down and still reading, then I'm in. This blog had me with the post "How to Mentor a Kid with Big (Possibly Unrealistic) Dreams."

Tricky Tuesday: Introvert Mom Extrovert Child

If I boiled down all of Racoon and my conflicts, this is at the heart of most. He needs more people time and I need more alone time. What I am trying to figure out is how much each of us needs to feel recharged. Right now our needs drain each other so neither one of us is happy. I currently need so much time to recharge (usually at night after everyone else is alseep), that there just aren't enough hours in the day.

I cannot feed his need to be with people all by myself, nor can he give me enough down time if it's just the two of us (well, three now with Robin). We seem to constantly be a sad couple, and I want to change that. At the end of the day, he resorts to being naughty because it's the only way he can get enough energy from my run-down batteries. It's a terrible pattern for us both and I feel squeezed dry.

So here are the million dollar questions: how much is enough and how do I make it happen?

"I aim to fit in my writing time as well as reading one chapter of fiction each day. If I get those two covered, I’m usually equipped to handle whatever twists and turns come my way," says Jaimie Martin at Simple Homeschool.

This is another great post on the topic - Grace for the Introverted Mom (favorite quote: "I won’t be able to sleep until I think about it.")

That sounds about right. But explaining this to my husband, also an extrovert, is difficult. "Why can't you handle just one child?" he used to ask me all the time when Raccoon was younger. Filling my needs can appear to him like I am being neglectful of our kids, or lazy.

As part of this post, I just have to mention that I love type talk. I am an INFP, my husband is an ENTJ, Raccon is an E_ _ _ (maybe SFP? N?), and Robin is still undecided. (Sidenote: understanding type has been very illuminating for my marriage. The two middle ones are personality and here is where my husband and I are similar, we are both Ns and our F/Ts are more middle than extreme. But our living preferences are exactly opposite - EJ (outgoing and structured) and IP (ingoing and unstructured). This is the secret to why we get along really well but have trouble living together. lol.) 

Our conflicting sources of energy are my biggest fear about homeschooling; how am I going to make it work for both of us? And throw in the fact that my little extrovert has social anxiety and needs very particular types of people interactions (small groups, a buddy, older kids).

Then we'll be adding in Robin once I figure out what she needs... which right now is not more than one car trip a day.



What am I doing that's working?

An outside preschool class for three hours two days a week. (We just started so I hope this works)
Stories on CD in the car (he usually wants me to talk nonstop in the car which drains me)
Projects for us to work on together at home (he gets my undivided attention and we're doing something we enjoy together)
Jumping on the trampoline together with Robin on a blanket on the grass (harder now that it's colder and wetter outside)
What it boils down to is outsourcing some of his energy needs without compromising mine.

What isn't working?

Finding enough kids for Raccoon to play with. Where can I find more opportunities for him that don't drain my energy? Outside spaces work best for us, but often there aren't any other kids there. We both get stressed at the play areas at kid restaurants (too busy and loud). Raccoon doesn't like structured activities like classes (too much sitting or waiting).

I can't save up my needs until nighttime. By evening I am empty and cannot cope with more demands. To stay sane, I need small breaks throughout the day with one long stretch (one to two hours).

Which of my strengths can I apply here?

What am I good at? Finding new places for us to explore. 

Brainstorm:

* Some sort of sport activity - it would have to be relatively unstructured and flexible with scheduling since neither one of us does that well with predictability. Maybe some sort of open gym? bouncy place?

* More playdates at home - I like having people come over because then I don't have the stress of driving, trying to get somewhere on time, and managing Raccoon's food allergies. These are usually a win-win for us. The problem is that Raccoon prefers children his age or a few years older, and everyone we know is busy at school.

* A homeschool coop - get-togethers yes, classes no.

* A membership to a kid's museum - we'd have to go at times when there aren't many children there, or it's the same overstimulation problem as at kid restaurants.

* A gym with childcare - I wonder how much this costs.

Possible solution (or first try at least):

Our win-win - unstructured play time with slightly older kids at our home, with a few special outings a week. I need a boy with a specific profile - extrovert! imaginative, energetic (but not out-of-control), playful, outdoorsy, and independent. Maybe I should advertise on craigslist:

 "Introvert mother looking for extrovert playmate for her extrovert son. 

Would prefer a homeschooled child (of any age) with flexible hours." 

Or as Raccoon suggested, we could just adopt more children. He said he wants five brothers and sisters. Sorry buddy, unless God steps in, that's not going to happen.

I've also considered getting him a kitten...

Letting Go

No matter how good something might seem, it may just not work for your family. I think this is especially true for homeschooling.

"...we also suck in messages from everything from the television to advertising to marketing, etcetera. These are hugely powerful forces that define what we want and how we view ourselves. What I want to argue for is not that we should give up on our ideas of success, but that we should make sure that they are our own. We should focus in on our ideas and make sure that we own them, that we’re truly the authors of our own ambitions." Alain de Botton

I am not going to do typical sit-down school with my son. I have known this for awhile, but somehow I keep coming back to it. I need to accept it, the sooner the better, and find instead what will work for us. As a little girl, I would have loved for someone to supply me with endless, increasingly difficult workbooks on various topics which I would have then happily completed. (By upper elementary, not so much. All I wanted to do at that point was read.)

Although it may seem like a trivial thing, I came to this realization (again) about our "school" by reading a post about a program called Reading Eggs (to which I'm not affiliated in any way). It sounds like a wonderful program and has worked for many families whose blogs I read. It would have worked for me as a child, for sure. But my son may never enjoy sitting down at the computer to complete a lesson, no matter how engaging it is designed to be. And definitely not now.

This isn't a bad thing, and at some point in his development there will be a need for seatwork and computer programs, but I have to accept that for now at least, this isn't us.

Unschooling

Homeschooling has been on my mind as Raccoon gets closer and closer to 4 years old. I found a series called I can't homeschool because... with a variety of reasons/excuses. My two objections, which weren't on the list, would be:
1) My son will miss the other kids.
2) My son doesn't enjoy following my lead.

For number one, we could probably find enough social activities, one way or another. And for number two... unschooling, or child-led learning. This seems to tend towards unit studies and deep investigation into the child's area(s) of interest. For a really great collection of blog posts about unschooling, go here. My favorite one is Laughing at Chaos' concept of StealthSchooling:

"See, he resists being taught something he thinks he already knows, but if he doesn’t already know what is being taught he thinks it’s too hard and shuts down. If I try to teach him, he is not in charge, and thus also shuts down...

So I find us somewhere between school-at-home homeschooling and full unschooling. I call it StealthSchooling; I wish to hell I could Trademark that. I quietly sneak in information in the form of documentaries, books, games, and iPad apps. Just enough pre-learning that he thinks he knows the topic. Then when he actually gets to the topic, he knows just enough to take off running."

I find unschooling appealing because honestly, I get bored with things too. I found this out while we were doing tot school. Only activities with a certain amount of complexity appeal to me to even try to teach to Raccoon. If he's interested, he just gets things. If not, then there's just no way I've found to turn that light on. When he's ready, he goes by leaps and bounds. He doesn't know the alphabet yet, but he knows the difference between an arachnid, a mammal, and an insect. He knows a bunch of snake names and that venomous and poisonous mean the same thing. When he feels like he needs to know the ABCs, he'll just do it.

This fall I might even have a play/school room in our new house in the States. Gasp! My mind is spinning with possibilities already. Home-un-something schooling, here we come!

The Socialization Question

This has been on my mind lately, with several friends and family making comments about Raccoon needing time to play with "friends." He tends to be a bit antisocial or veeeeery slow to warm up. Other children, especially if they are younger than him, are often too touchy, too much in his space, and too unpredictable for him to play comfortably.

With Raccoon's sensory issues and food allergies, I wouldn't even really consider sending him to some sort of program, except that he does seem to want to be around other children at times. Last week he came home crying from the park because some older children wouldn't play with him. Where we live, the majority of children are in daycare/preschool from 1+ years old, so it is hard for us to consistently find other playmates. Of course I'm fun, but after watching him with his cousins, I feel like just being at home with me isn't enough. For now, I'm keeping the matter in prayer and talking with my husband about it. I recently received this in a newsletter I subscribe to, and although it does not seem based on research, it does echo some of my questions.



Your Questions About Social Growth

Don't I have to send my small child to preschool or daycare for socialization?

One of the great modern myths is that children need other children to become "socialized." The exact opposite is true. The notion that little children learn how to be civilized from being with each other has little to recommend it. What can a three-year-old teach another three-year-old? Answer: How to behave like a three-year-old.

When we place tiny children together, the result is chaos. If one child is a biter, then other children get bitten and learn that biting may be useful in self-defense. Generally, this is not the kind of social idea that mothers want their children to have.

If I don't send my child to kindergarten, how will they learn to share with other children?

Sometimes mothers are convinced to put their child with other children in what are called "play groups" or "kindergarten" because mother wants her child to learn to share. Mother believes that this cannot be learned at home from her. Sharing is an admirable and worthwhile objective. But two and three-year-olds are not ready to share anything. Instead, they defend their belongings against any and all comers. The "play group" only stays civilized if each mother stands right next to her child and protects that child from all the other children in the group. "Sharing" occurs only when mother pries the beloved toy truck out of her child's grasp and hands it to another child, who then gets a death grip on the truck until his mother says that he has "shared" the truck for long enough and it is pried out of his grasp to be returned to its little, very anxious owner.

If the above scene takes place without a mother with each child, then the result is much worse. Without mother at his side, the child will simply fight to keep his toy or be overpowered by a bigger, more aggressive child. He either learns to fight or to flee. Is this socialization?

Where can my child best learn proper behavior?

Little children do not need other little children to become socialized - they need mother and father. Civilized behavior is learned at home from mother and father. Children learn right from wrong from mother and father and grandmother and grandfather, or they do not learn it at all. The longer a small child spends with his mother each day, the more civilized he will be. The less time he spends with mother each day, the less civilized he will be.

Arrange for your child to spend more time with you every day and less time with other little children. Be consistent, fair, and honest in all your interactions with your child. In a few months you will have a more mature, kind, and helpful child, but, even better, you will be spending precious time with a wonderful companion who will love and support you for the rest of your life.

from the IAHP Newsletter, November 2012, Issue 34  

Almost there...

I have been teaching an early learning class for moms with kids 0-4, so Raccoon and I have not done much lately. My new printer ink is fabulous though. I have our lesson plan for next week only half-done, but it's summer, we have live-in guests, and we've been travelling, so I'm not worried about what we didn't do. Now it's time to jump back into learning. My theme for next week is the ocean and people in our community. We'll be starting Year C in September, roughly corresponding to Pre-K. I'm still using most of my favorite resources from Year B, but I'll be adding some Abeka things in the fall. More on that to come.

Well-Rounded or Specialization

There is a little voice in my brain telling me that I may need to remember this for Raccoon later:

"I think formal school puts a lot of emphasis on being “well-rounded” but the “real world” doesn’t necessarily demand that," a comment from Trish on this blog post. Her main idea is to do the essential things the student doesn't like in the context of the things the student does like, as the means to a rewarding end.

Another mom said, "I also find that age matters for us. Younger ages: it seemed more important to me to provide more balance... Now in our 5th year homeschooling, we're specializing more."

For Raccoon right now, the biggest piece of our time pie is physical activity, into which I incorporate other learning whenever I can in a fun and brief way. I have considered the homeschooling option, depending on where he's at in a few years. Right now, anything structured drives us both crazy (classes at Gymboree and getting to church on time are pretty much all we've tried), but it's early yet.

Early Learning Schedule

I haven't really found a groove that works for us. But I take heart from the many homeschooling bloggers who mention that it took several years to get into the swing of things and to figure out their children's optimal learning styles. As I'm just at the beginning of our journey, I find this reassuring.

Below is my tentative schedule (more like suggestions really) for January 2012. I figure I'll try it out for a month, then tweek it as needed.

Sunday – plan Bible stories & verse for the week, evening church
Monday – home day, art/craft, music
Tuesday – home day, art/craft, language                              
Wednesday – playgroup, baking
Thursday – alternate special outings
Friday – family day
Saturday – home day, housework

In addition to the weekly activities, my monthly goal is one of each: museum, concert, field trip, and a visit to a family friend. Reading and math are always on my mind and I just casually (and briefly) work them into whatever we're doing.

Note to self: If I do end up homeschooling CM in a more formal way some day, I liked this idea for organizing assignments using a private blog."